When Is It Time to Break Up? 8 Signs Your Relationship Has No Future
When boring routine and constant wars become a couple’s lifestyle, the breakup seems to be inevitable. However, some people are scared to leave a sinking ship more than they are afraid to stay with a toxic partner. So, they choose to keep riding the dead horse. Of course, deciding when to end a relationship may be difficult. But are there any ways to identify that your relationship is stuck in a rut and you will never be able to sort the things out? Check these 8 not-so-obvious signs that will dispel all your doubts regarding the necessity to make your love story come to an end.
1. Putting you down and ruining your self-esteem
Unflattering comments regarding your appearance, clothes, manner to talk, or even hold a fork are not rare. And they will definitely become more and more often with time. At first, you try to take them with a smile or turn everything into a joke. But finally, you find yourself hurt by the unhealthy criticism coming from your lovemate. Offensive words by no means contribute to your personal growth. This is emotional abuse that leads to the destruction of your self-esteem.
The same applies to your plans for the future. If your partner regularly condemns your ideas and makes fun of your dreams, the question when is it time to break up should not be even considered, as a correct answer to it is “immediately”.
A truly loving person would diplomatically point out flaws and offer all possible help to fix the situation.
2. Not listening to you
Someone who is really interested in you will at least try to share your interests and hobbies. Even if your partner doesn’t like them at all. Of course, listening to the 30-minute monologue about Justin Bieber may seem a heavy burden. But even in that case, someone who loves you would be able to catch at least a general idea of what you have been talking about. You may think that it is not a big deal if you are constantly ignored while trying to share your passion for something with the person you love. But it’s the little things that are the most important.
3. Insisting on making love when you are not in a mood
Unfortunately, many guys are sincerely convinced that if a girl says no, in fact, she is just waiting to be conquered. The same refers to the girls – they believe the guys are ready for sex 24/7. And in case the boyfriend doesn’t want to make love, he would be considered a cheater or just an impotent. There may be thousands of reasons why a person might not be ready for physical contact at this particular moment. However, if your partner sees that you do not feel like making love right now and still insists on intimacy, then it seems that this person is only interested in sex, not in your problems, desires, or the state of your health. Do you deserve an attitude like this? No. So, if you couldn’t decide how to know when to break up, this is the most definite sign to finally do it.
4. Cheating on you or lying to you
Cheating or a serious lie can not only provoke a crisis in the relationship but also deprive you of the ability to trust your loved one. Restoring old trust can take years and requires a lot of mutual effort. Frankly speaking, sometimes no effort is sufficient to stick the broken happiness together- and in this case, you need to find the courage and admit that it's time to put an end to your relationship. If the bitter memories of betrayal continue to hurt you even after a long time, and every step of your beloved leads to suspicion – seriously think whether you need such a torment. Keeping a relationship just for the sake of a relationship is not the best option.
5. Not sharing your life goals
Even in the most difficult times, achieving a common goal becomes a real lifeline for the lovers. Conflicts and misunderstandings are possible, but the presence of the common dreams determines the whole meaning of the relations. Do you know what exactly unites you? Sexual attraction and the presence of mutual friends are great, but what do you both want from life? The lack of common goals will inevitably become a stumbling block in your relationship and a cause of constant quarrels. As a result, one day you will decide to break up regretfully admitting that you are too different to be together.
6. Humiliating you in public
If your partner has humiliated you in public once, most likely that it will be happening over and over again. Public humiliation of a partner tells only about the deep self-loathing of the one who humiliates. No matter how much love you give to this person, it will not fix the situation without a firm desire of your soulmate to change the course of things and start working on self-esteem. But it might be too difficult for a person not only to solve the problem but even to admit it exists.
If your partner is addicted to, for example, alcohol or drugs, is a shopaholic, a gambler, a workaholic, or obsessed with sex, you will always play a supporting role in your soulmate’s life and, most probably, won’t get the emotional connection you’ve expected. Your partner's addiction can ruin not only their life but yours as well. Not a very pleasant prospect. In this case, you may only help your partner fight this addiction. However, everything depends on their desire to change the course of things.
8. Emotionally unfaithful
Some people believe that monogamy is the only possible option for a relationship. Others consider it a heavy burden they would never assume.
If you have cheated because of the desire to get some new sexual experience, the relationship can still be saved. But if there is an emotional attachment to the person with whom you’ve had physical contact, it’s time you told the truth to your current partner and end your relationship.
Usually, the first question people ask when they find out about their partner's infidelity is, “Do you love him/her?” Because it is the emotional, not the physical connection that is the core of the relationship. If it is gone, then your relations are doomed to end.
Deciding when to end a relationship may be extremely difficult. Until we are 100% sure that the relationship is over, we continue to believe that everything can be saved. And this is quite logical, as we may become so attached to a person, that it would be very painful to break up. Not everyone has the courage to end a relationship the moment it has actually exhausted itself. If at least 4 points out of all the mentioned above are about you, maybe it’s high time you started a new page of your life.